Surgery for Women

Photo by Pablo Heimplatz on Unsplash

“Maybe we should call him Ferdinand instead of Fernando?” I tell my daughter. “He has the personality of an Austrian asshole.”

“Have you seen an Austrian asshole leave voluntarily?” she responds without missing a beat. “Latin lovers on the other hand…”

Fernando is my fibroid. He is impressive — large, hard, planning to stay. There is no doubt it is a he. Only a dude will be so intent on grabbing your…